Gippergate Redux

by David Walske

He that shall live by the soundbite shall die by the soundbite.

"There you go again."

 -Ronald Reagan
  1980 Presidential campaign debate
  with Jimmy Carter

Full text of the debate

"I'm all confused now."

 -Ronald Reagan
  1984 Presidential campaign debate
  with Walter Mondale

Full text of the debate

Monday, December 1st -[just in time to miss Thanksgiving]- the Showtime cable network is to air "The Reagans," an original network miniseries that Republican conservatives successfully pressured CBS to cancel. See previous post, "C is  for Censorship." At the time of the cancellation Viacom, parent company of both networks, promised a subsequent airing on Showtime. It is refreshingly surprising for it to show up so soon. Many believed that the Viacom would silently let the show slip into oblivion.

I was outraged by the expiation of the show from CBS, a network with a long history of repeatedly folding under pressure. I nearly canceled my subscription to its sibling network Showtime in protest. I restrained myself only because of Showtime's history of presenting a significant volume of positive Gay themed programming. [And of course I can hardly wait to find out what happens to Brian and Justin, Michael and Ben, Emmet and Ted, and everyone's favorite, Debbie. Sharon Gless we love you.]

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc

Civility

by David Walske

Today, Thanksgiving Day, there is much to be thankful for, and much to incite rancor. The grand conflation of life, the good and the bad, the familiar and the foreign, the sacred and the profane, all mixed up together - Abraxas. To process these swirling streams of ambiguity is sometimes too much for the human psyche to bear. Still we try, sisyphean as our efforts may be.

Yesterday afternoon I rushed about, as did many of my fellow human beings, scurrying antlike to complete the tasks that would fulfill any and all requirements of interaction with the outside world for the term of the impending holiday weekend. The Post Office, the bank, the shrink.

Traffic was horrendous. Quoting George Carlin, "Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?" Sarcasm aside, this was eminently so on the streets of Los Angeles, Thanksgiving eve. After having endured the maniacal and the idiotic, I decided I'd had about all the fun I could stand and headed home. I traveled on my favorite "secret" side-street, avoiding the crush of traffic along the major Boulevards. Brake and gas, brake and gas, I made my way through the stop signs, anointing each with a rolling "California stop" as I passed. Approaching one such intersection, I noticed an old man, beard of waistcoat length, cane in hand, hobbling towards the crosswalk.

The moment of decision, frozen stillframe, was upon me. Scuffed wing tip in midair, the old man's foot had not quite yet contacted pavement as he teetered in transition from concrete to macadam. By law of traffic I could rightfully, if not ethically, proceed. But civility held me. I made eye contact, yielding right of way, that he should cross safely. Just as he was about to emerge from the embattlement of my stilled vehicle into the open space of the far side of the crosswalk, a super-sized SUV swerved from behind me and into the opposing lane, passing with a mighty roar and nearly hitting the old man. "Maniac!"

Rants about maniacal drivers are so common as to be remarkably unremarkable. It's tempting to blame popular entertainment -[action movies, interactive games, and the like]- of the type in which celluloid Schwarzeneggers crash through traffic without regard to flesh and bone. But that's the easy way out. Movies and other forms of popular entertainment may sometimes act as societal catalyst, but as such they can do no more than activate the existing social chemistry. Popular entertainment media cannot force anyone to do anything against their will. It can only reveal existing mores.

My personal pet rant is not bad driving, but the subsuming issue of bad manners. I mourn the extinction of civility in our society. I'm not advocate of an Emily Post etiquette, such as careful adherence to protocol in the use of the correct fork and spoon during each of the courses of a formal dinner sans elbows on the table. That sort of thing, while charming at times and laughable at others, is ritual. It has its place, but is on the whole of no real consequence. What concerns me is how poorly we treat each other, how little respect for human dignity we display in daily exchanges with our fellow human beings.

When I enter a public building, as I cross the threshold I turn my head to see if anyone is entering just behind me. If there is someone there, I hold the door. Whether woman, man, child, or alien from another planet [or dimension], I hold the door. I do this because it is civil. I seek nothing in return for this small act of civility, not even a "Thank you." A response is always welcome, but is neither expected nor solicited on my part. This works out well. I feel good in the performance of a small gesture, and the recipient, at the very least, is slightly less inconvenienced in transit, and at best, experiences a momentary sense of platonic connection with another human being. Where I get into trouble is when the roles are reversed. I've slammed, face first, into more than a few doors not held. Mishaps of my mistaken assumption that such small acts of civility are ubiquitous. A sad comment this.

But today, is Thanksgiving. I'm thankful. Even my nephew, who less than a week ago was severely beaten in a random act of violence by an unknown assailant, is thankful. To draw breath is to be thankful for the continuing opportunity to "dive into the plasma pool." To experience the cacophony of life, the trill of its highs, the deep base of its oppressive lows. Abraxas.

And in perfect synchonicity, just as I finish writing this post, I receive an email from an acquaintance in Dublin, Ireland. He is replying to my message, "One of these days I'll make over to Dublin for a visit," a wish I've been expressing for many years. He writes, "David, Dublin will be here waiting for you with a thousand welcomes, the day you decide to come. The key is under the mat."

Perhaps there's hope for civility after all.

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc

Our Lady of Weight Loss

A Thanksgiving Message from Jouissance

May Atkins be with you this holiday, and may you dwell in the house of lo-carbo the rest of your days... if that's what you want.

Happy Thanksgiving to all from Jouissance.
It's Thanksgiving fer crissakes, live a little!

- Space Cowboy Dave

Quite unexpectedly the following message arrived by providence of divine email at Jouissance, amid numerous other messages of the prophets of penis and breast enlargement. Verily our junk mail folder runneth over with abundance that it be emptied frequently into the trash bin. This message of inspiration and carbohydrates however, we choose instead to commit to the holy sacrament of the Blog. Enjoy.

Copyright © 2002-2003 Our Lady of Weight Loss
All Rights Reserved

Commodious Reading

by David Walske

Holiday reading recommendations, just in time for Thanksgiving and Christmas.

As I continue to arduously, but enjoyably work my way through Jamie O'Neil's remarkably enjoyable but challenging novel, "At Swim, Two Boys" I am reminded of dialog from David Hare's screenplay adaptation of Michael Cunningham's novel, "The Hours."

As thoroughly enthralled as I am by these engaging works of O'Neil, Cunningham, and Hare, I thought that perhaps a recommendation of some lighter Holiday reading was in order. So... where to begin my search for a small, but select catalog of lighter-weight but whorthwhile prose to suggest?

Titles from my my very own bathroom library. That's it! And so you have it, from the shelves above the porcelain. Enjoy.

Everyone Poops
Taro Gumi, Amanda Mayer Stinchecum (translator)

Originally written by Japanese author Taro Gumi to calm the jangled nerves of his young son whilst he endured the rigors of potty-training, "Everyone Poops" is a W.C. classic for all ages. Don't let the publisher's suggested age range of 18 months to 4 years fool you. I know more than a few adults that could benefit from this stimulating volume. Translated by Amanda Mayer Stinchecum [I kid you not], who's other artful works of translation include, "The Gas We Pass," and "The Holes in Your Nose," has barely begun to scratch the surface of this genre. Body horror begone. We all do this stuff; get used to it.

American Film Institute Desk Reference:
The Complete Guide to Everything You Need to Know about the Movies
Melinda Corey, George Ochoa
Introduction by Clint Eastwood

The title really does say it all. Years ago when I was studying acting and film, the only reference of this sort was the considerably drier, "The Filmgoer's Companion," now out of print and unavailable, except for the dusty copy shoved to the back of my book closet. The lushly illustrated, information packed "American Film Institute Desk Reference", produced by AFI (The American Film Institute), is a significant step up. This glossy hardbound volume of over 600 pages, with index, will keep you happily distracted for hours - if necessary - and authoritatively answers burning cinematic questions such as, "What was the name of that Cary Grant movie about a dancing caterpillar?"

Futurama-O-Rama
Matt Groening, et al

"Futurama-O-Rama," the "comic book" version of Futurama - the best animated television series ever to be canceled well before its time, which happens to be the year 3000 - but don't get me on a rant about the FOX Network; that's an entire post unto itself. This delightful "quality-paperback-bound" volume, printed on the pulpy ink-thirsty paper of childhood comic books, brings me back to my future childhood in a way that only a trip through a tear in the space-time-continuum can. If you should happen to fall into a "freezer doodle thingy" this book might just be your best defense against drunken robots from the future. Take my word for it. And be sure not to miss the full-page ads for the "Slug-O-Vac" - removes unsightly, embarrassing brain slugs, "The Clapper Clapper" - why "clap on - clap off" if you don't have to, and Zap Brannigan's call for all patriotic citizens of earth to get DOOPed.

The New Yorker Book of Literary Cartoons
Bob Mankoff, editor

Since we're in the realm of witty and intelligent cartoons, I'd be remiss not to mention "The New Yorker Book of Literary Cartoons." One of a series of several collections of cartoons from The New Yorker magazine. Even when I don't have the time to read each monthly issue of the magazine, I always have time to scan, cover to cover, for the cartoons. It doesn't mater if you're the one that explains the humor of the more obscure cartoons to your friends, or if they have to explain them to you. Every so often you should get stumped. If not then you are reading below your level.

Passing Time in the Loo
Volume One
Stevens W. Anderson, editor

"Passing Time in the Loo" is a lot like the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, as described in Douglas Adams' "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy." Albeit in print form rather than sub-ether tablet, "Passing Time in the Loo" is the compendium of all knowledge in a single volume, or nearly so. [Note "Volume One" in the title, implying a "Volume Two" to come?] All human knowledge, from classical to modern, divided into nine "Library" sections. You might spend the entire day in "the reading room" with this one.

Enjoy!

To buy any of these books, please click any of the links on this page. All purchases made from Amazon by clicking any of the Amazon links - text-links, icons, or Amazon buttons - on any of the pages of this Web site help to support Jouissance. We're not Public Radio - no pledge drives - but we'd like to be.

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc

Tmesis Thesis

From blogjam.com

Many thanks to Reid Stell of pismire.com for this suggestion.
Click here if you'd like to make suggestions for future posts.

Ich bin ein jelly donut

by David Walske

I admit it. I'm a linguophile.

For as long as I can remember, I've been fascinated with language. My sister Kathleen, shares this passion with me. A linguist and an ESL (English as a Second Language) teacher, she speaks four languages: English [natively], Spanish [as fluently as any native speaker of Mexico], French, German [some], and probably a few other languages she's picked up along the way since last we spoke.

Get my sister and me chatting about language, and we can clear the room in no time. The two of us drone on, happily exchanging anecdotes, factoids, and quips about such sexy topics as word derivation, syntax, grammar, and idiomatic expression. Kathleen studied for a time at the University of Mexico City. During her attendance there she had many visitors from the United States. [College students living in nearby foreign countries had best get used to frequent visitors.] Mary, whom my sister had befriended while attending the University of Arizona, joined Kathleen in Mexico City for a week of tourism. Mary had some remedial Spanish language skills, and so felt comfortable venturing out alone on daytime explorations of the city, while my sister attended classes. During one such outing, Mary decided to purchase a pair of pants, very short shorts that at the time - the 1970's - were known as, "Hot Pants." She ventured into a women's clothing shop and approached a salesman, "Usted tiene pantalones caliente?" Nonplused, the salesman fell silent for a moment and then began to laugh, as did all within earshot. Mary waxed quizzical at the odd response. Mary had fallen into the most common trap of the neophyte nonnative speaker, that of the cultural idiom.

As vernacular expressions move from language to language and culture to culture, many do so in untranslated form. For example it is not unusual to see English language "Drug Store" signs in Paris, France. This phenomenon also holds true in reverse: I have lived in Los Angeles for over twenty-six years and have never once referred to it as "The Angels" - although we have our share of both angels and "diablos" as do all cities, large or small. Mary, in her attempt to translate "hot pants" into Spanish had unknowingly asked the salesman if he was horny. Suppressing his laughter as best he could, showing the civility of a gentleman, the salesman overlooked the unfortunate malentendu and directed her to a display of shorts located beneath a sign, printed in English that read, "Hot Pants." It was only later that evening, when she recounted the story to my sister, that her mistake was made clear to her.

Mary, embarrassed as she may have been by the encounter, was certainly in good company. Perhaps the most famous linguistic faux pas ever, is the one committed by President John F. Kennedy during a speech he delivered in West Berlin on June 26, 1963. President Kennedy's words of friendship and diplomacy, "Today, in the world of freedom, the proudest boast is 'Ich bin ein Berliner,'" had been intended to inspire a sense of cooperation and camaraderie between the Eastern Blok and the Western World. Unfortunately, the German language words, inserted into an otherwise English language address had been mistranslated. A "Berliner" is a type of sweet pastry. In effect, due to no fault of his own - rather to that of a translator - the greatest statesman of all time proclaimed to the world, "I am a Jelly Donut." Such errors were rare - all but nonexistent - in the time of JFK, and a respectful German delegation restrained even the slightest of titters, out of well-placed respect and admiration for President Kennedy.

Today unfortunately, our national embarrassment, President George W. Bush utters an incessant stream of malapropisms. His verbal ineptitude is so pervasive that it now goes almost unnoticed. We react to Dubya's frequent fumbling trips of the tongue, with bemused apathy.

A notorious example of international linguistic blunder occurred in 1977 when President Jimmy Carter, during a state visit to Poland, delivered an address that had been translated into the Polish language. In his introductory remarks President Carter had intended to convey his warm sentiments towards the country and people of Poland, embracing them in their nascent emergence from the Cold War shadow of the "Iron Curtain." The original English language text of the President's speech, "As I left America I thought about how much I loved the Polish people," had been debased to a translation that instead conveyed a meaning to the effect of, "When I left America, never to return, I thought how I wanted to go to bed with the Polish people." And you thought language was boring.

Language translation is a tricky business. Those whose business it is, divide the field into three broad categories: Translation, Localization, and Internationalization. The first of these three, translation, is likely to produce "jelly donut" expressions. Localization on the other hand is a far better choice, in that it takes into account cultural differences in conveying meaning from one language to another. Some years ago while working in the computer software industry, I was given the opportunity to name a software product. The name I chose, "System Genie" was subjected to extensive international scrutiny, to be certain that it would not convey some unintended malodorous meaning in another culture. The name was approved, under the advice and consent of native speakers of languages from countries around the world, assuring a smooth integration of the product into the global markeplace. In the checkered history of international marketing, many other product placements could have been described as anything but smooth. See "Bite the Wax Tadpole" for an example of an international product migration of lesser success. [Be sure to also read the "Editor's Note" of corrigendum, clarifying the facts of the story.]

The third category, Internationalization conveys meaning in a single iteration that is understood by people of nearly every culture and language. Documents produced in this manner are generally pictographic in nature. Like the assembly instructions for that new workstation from Ikea® you've been struggling to assemble. Beware of furniture with names like Stökle. Actually, I have purchased many products from Ikea, and shop there regularly.

Most would agree that while automated machine translation of text has greatly improved over the years, nothing beats the human touch of a native speaker. Software publishers offer sophisticated translation products and services that compliment human translation. Both Google and AltaVista provide free access to lighter-weight versions of Web-based technologies that programmatically translate short phrases or even entire web pages on the fly. For instance, you can view the page you are currently reading in German . The translations aren't perfect of course, but hey its free! Just for fun, try taking a sentence or phrase for a spin around the world. Remember the childhood game of telephone? It's a little like that.

For example, the sentence:

That sounds exactly like the first sentence of the manual that came with my new coffee maker. Have fun, but exercise discretion as to where and how you choose to use these automated translations. Unless you want to go to bed with the Polish people.

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc

Anarchist Agenda

by David Walske

George Bush sent the expected postcard from London today, "Having a great time; wish you weren't queer." His actual statement was more like, "I will work with congressional leaders and others to do what is legally necessary to defend the sanctity of marriage." This response from Bush to the the Massachusetts high court, which ruled that banning same-sex-couples from marriage is a violation of the State constitution, came as no great surprise to anyone. More saber rattling against the so-called homosexual agenda. Personally, my homosexual agenda is fairly lightweight, having to do with such things as picking up my dry cleaning rather than unraveling the fabric of American society.

Drolleries aside, the real onslaught against American "family values" comes from within the ranks of Mr. Bush's conservative cronies. The arguments made against Gay marriage consistently fall into three broad categories of spurious argument:

Spurious Argument Number One:

A primary impetus for the founding of this country was that of religious freedom. Under pre-Revolutionary British rule, there was no provision for separation of church and state. The King had the power to ordain a singular state-sanctioned religion to the exclusion of all others. President Bush repeatedly makes verbal representations of the United States government as defender of the "sacred" bonds of matrimony. This statement is flawed at its core. The Constitution of the United States, in the first sentence of the Bill of Rights, states unambiguously that "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion or prohibiting the free exercise thereof." Our American government is by its very definition secular. References to God uttered in the pledge of allegiance or printed on our currency has no bearing in this matter -[by the Bible's own account Jesus, as the son and representative of God, "cast out the money changers" from the "house of the lord," so please let's not get into that tired old "In God We Trust" debate]. In America, God is as each of us perceives him - or her - to be, or not to be. This is guaranteed by the United States Constitution, a document I highly recommend reading. I carry my "little red book" with me where ever I go. This is not the "little red book" of Maoist communist teachings, it is a pocket sized printing of the entire text of the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution of the United States. [Okay, the cover may be more burgundy than red, but you have to allow me some poetic license here.] I strongly suggest that you purchase your own copy, available from the "Cato Institute." Carry it with you at all times; you never known when you might need it in the current political climate of so-called "patriot act" legislation.

Proclamations by the President regarding God and religion and inforcement of such by U.S. law, as are Mr. Bush's vows to promote the notion of marriage as "sacred" [vested in religious rather than secular authority] under the laws of the United States, is in direct contradiction to the vow he took upon inauguration to preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution. Dereliction of the Presidential oath of office might well be construed as treasonous. Repeated violation of his oath might be considered grounds for impeachment and removal from office. Speaking ideologically, let us not forget that under President Bush's executive orders our nation has committed significant resources and sacrificed countless lives, with the expressed intent of bringing American-style democracy to the Middle East, a democracy that by precept, keeps separate the powers of church and state. Yet at home our President promotes policies which support a diametrically opposite viewpoint.

As for the issue of procreation and the welfare of children raised within households of same-sex unions: those who state false, skewed, or manufactured so-called psychological statistics that purport to show the superiority of the heterosexual household as a child rearing environment are sadly mistaken, mislead, or outright liars. All that is required of most heterosexual couples to produce offspring is a physical act of sexual intercourse and conception. Legions of adult children of abusive heterosexual households can rightfully attest to the fact that parenting and being a parent are two very distinct realities. Same-sex partners that desire children must take extraordinary steps to accomplish that goal. Adoption is a long and arduous, often unproductive process for homosexual couples, as is artificial insemination, and even surrogate childbirth. Heterosexual consummation that leads to childbirth is, not always but, sometimes the product of thoughtless accidental conception. "Oh my God, I'm pregnant." In contradistinction the introduction of a child into the household of a same-sex union is always a conscious act of unselfish love and caring that requires significant self-sacrifice on the part of the Gay parents. Children raised by same-sex couples, generally feel a great sense of parental love and security, typically grow up to be well adjusted adults, exhibit confidence in facing the adversities of adulthood, and are generally possessed of an accepting and unbiased view of the world. This is not conjecture. This is scientifically established psychological fact.

Spurious Argument Number Two:

The fallacy of this argument needs little explanation. The legalization of same-sex-marriage is an act of inclusion rather than one of exclusion. Detractors of Gay marriage, in making their assertions, often cite a centuries-old societal structure in which the rights and freedoms of the individual form the smallest of sub-components that make up the building blocks of family units, from whence the structure of society and the rule of law are built. It is counterintuitive to suggest that increasing the nucleation of individuals into family units would drive society towards a state of destabilization. Quite the opposite is true. By providing a greater number of ratified marriages, the legalization of Gay matrimony increases the number of the building blocks with which we may seek to repair, reinforce, rebuild, and expand our society. Conversely, denying such unions promotes fragmentation, weakening society as a whole. Banning or failing to legally ratify same-sex marriage serves the goals of anarchy not civilization, entropy not stability.

Spurious Argument Number Three:

It is time that those who would quote so-called scientific fact move into the twenty-first century with the rest of us. The jury is in on demarcation of race based on genetic profiling. Race, as such does not exist. Studies of mitochondrial DNA have proven inarguably that all humans, Caucasian, Black, Asian, Hispanic, and all those of the other categories of race I fail to mention here, are descendent from a single gene pool of African origin. This has been established in the laboratory through the sciences of microscopy and in the field through the findings of archaeological science. In purely scientific terms, race does not exist. Does this mean then the civil rights legislation brought into law, through the arduous, indefatigable effort and unimaginable sacrifice of many, in the late 1960's and early 1970's is superfluous? Of course not. The concept of race, while bearing no merit in science is, a social phenomenon that is very real in this country. We pretend to live in a color blind society. In reality our society is often one that instead turns a blind eye to the injustice of unfair discrimination. Great strides have been made in the advancement of equal opportunityin this country, albeit not ubiquitously so. But true equality of opportunity is not to be judged solely on the parity of avenues of advancement, but must also account for decades of oppression resulting in a retardation of achievement that is inherited generationally. It's not just a matter of being given an opportunity to compete, it is also where you start out on the playing field. More on this subject in subsequent posts.

Ethnic groups that can be delineated by visually discernible characteristics and are rooted in cluture are established by birth. Members of an ethnic group are born into it, absorb its culture, and generally have pride in their ethic background, but they do not choose their ethnicity. It chooses them. Some whose features are not easily identified as being of their own ethnic group can "pass" as a member of another ethnic group, and may choose to do so in order to lessen entrenched social stigma that might otherwise retard their advancement in career and society as a whole. It is a sad statement, not about the individual, but about society that this is sometimes a pragmatic necessity. In spite of advances in social reform, our society says - in deed if not always in word, "Be white, be male, and be heterosexual if you seek untrameled advancement." In some cases it may be possible, and in fact necessary, for an individual to conceal all three of these factors - including gender - in order to seek and attain worldly achievement.

While the science of why some people are born homosexual is not entirely understood, there are strong scientific indicators of a likely physiological basis. Homosexuality may well be the birth control method of the species. It has been noted in numerous scientific studies that as population density increases, in both humans and animals, so does the incidence of homosexuality. Today's swollen human population has reached a level that brings us ever nearer to the brink of extinction as a species, a phenomenon antipodal to that of the biblical era.

It has been suggested by some opponents of the Gay community that homosexuality is a choice. This is simply not the case. Simple logic affirms the fallacy of the "choice" argument. From birth our society bombards us with messages of heterosexuality. Even the most open and progressive household is rife with messages that promote a heterosexual agenda. As a child begins to reach puberty, a time during which awareness of sexuality begins to emerge, the messages of the heterosexual hegemony from peers and authority figures become even stronger. Many a child has been battered in the schoolyard for little more than "appearing" to be Gay. [The instigatory affectation or attribute is usually one of effeminacy. But homosexuals are not inherently effeminate. The conflation of the two is a common misconception based in sociology and psychology of a complexity beyond the limited scope of this post.] And as the individual continues to mature, the societal messages often become even more barbarous and insidious. The tragic demise of college student Matthew Shepard is a poignant case in point.

In general it is human a nature for individuals to assume the path of least resistance. Truly courageous individualism is so rare that we reserve a special term for such people: heroes. It is clear that if homosexuality were a choice, very few would make that choice. But in fact, at the very least, ten percent of the human population is homosexual - probably more. We in the Gay community are not also without our heroes, those who stand visibly at the front of our group, at personal risk, in our defense. But in general we are not members of the Gay community because we have chosen to do so as an act of civil disobedience -[several U.S. States still maintain sodomy laws that specifically prohibit homosexuality. Some of these laws apply to any non-procreative sexual activity, be it homosexual or heterosexual.]

We are Gay because we are Gay. We are no less a minority group in peril of having our civil rights abridged than is any other delineated sub-group of the general population. If a constitutional amendment were proposed to prohibit marriage between non-Caucasions a hue and cry like none heard before would arise. Yet when House Majority Leader Tom DeLay, Texas Republican, supports "...a constitutional amendment banning Gay marriage," it incites little comment among his peers. It is time to end this absurdity. There is no valid argument for banning Gay marriage. The only purpose of such a ban is the continued perpetration of insidious discrimination and lies, and disservice to the Gay community and society at large.

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc

Myelin Sheath

by David Walske

In 1998, as many were preparing to enter a self-induced, media-fed state of hysteria over the dreaded Y2K bug, I was far too lost in the depths of sorrow to care all that much about the havoc expected of two mislaid digits of code. In April of that year Katie, my beloved dog, faithful companion of nearly fifteen years, had passed away. Not long after, my dear friend Ellen was diagnosed with an illness I had never heard of before, Guillain-Barré syndrome. When, upon being admitted to the hospital, she had assured me that she was of the belief, and had every assurance from her doctor, that she would recover fully in a matter of months, a year at most, I was calmed. Ninety percent of those afflicted with Guillan-Barré syndrome recover, most of them completely, although often requiring extended physical therapy to regain a fully robust state of health. This Guillain-Barré syndrome, while indeed life threatening had a ninety percent survival rate. Myself having survived AIDS, an illness that had been calculated to have a 100 percent mortality rate, I had every reason to believe that Ellen, given such favorable odds, would survive to reclaim vibrant health. Besides, I was already too numbed by shock and grief over Katie's death - a numbness I had set about accelerating through the self-medication of alcohol and drugs - to believe otherwise.

Physicians, Georges Guillan and Jean-Alexandre Barré discovered the eponymous illness while treating French soldiers during World War One. Their patients exhibited symptoms of paralysis similar to those of Polio, but uncharacteristically symmetrical in presentation. The paralysis of Polio is typically asymmetrical, affecting one side of the body more than the other, whereas these newly observed symptoms of weakness and loss of muscle control manifested evenly. At first thought to be the result of some new pathogen or perhaps a mutation of the Polio virus, the illness was eventually identified as a type of autoimmune disorder. Triggered by transient infection, Guillan-Barré syndrome causes the immune system to over-respond. In doing so it loses a sense of self/not-self and attacks the myelin sheath that surrounds the many nerves that carry signals from brain to muscle. The malady is generally self-retracting, requiring treatment not so much for the illness itself, but rather in support of the vital muscle driven life functions such as respiration and circulation that are collaterally affected. Intubation in the application of artificial respiration is often required, because the stream of autonomic signals that cause the intercostal muscles to expand and contract in the process of breathing typically becomes disrupted during the worst stages of the illness.

The myelin sheath that surrounds the nerve tissue serves as both insulation and catalyst, as it protects the vulnerable nerve fibers and amplifies the signals they carry. In most instances of Guillan-Barré syndrome, as the self-induced attack subsides, the myelin sheath repairs itself and most if not all nerve function lost in the illness is restored, as is the health of the patient.

My friend Ellen was not among those in the ninety percent survival group. She passed away while being intubated, most likely succumbing to asphyxiation or cardiac arrest, or both. In the distracted, disturbed state of my own life in the days preceding Ellen's passing, I was not as attentive to her as I wish I had been. Ellen was one of the most compassionate, ethical, and loving people I have ever known. I once told her, some years before her illness, how much I admired her. She was utterly surprised that I would say such a thing. As is so of most truly humane souls, she was unaware of or underestimated her own humanity and kindness. It was not something she did, it was something she was.

The universe, full of ever-expanding dark matter, appears to be a cold and unfeeling place. Perhaps there is a warm center of light beyond what we can experience directly in this life. As an avowed hopeful agnostic, I know that the most important thing I know is that I don't know. But one thing I do know is this. In the caustic, barbaric, raging torrent of this life, upstream through which we swim, we are each other's myelin sheaths. We perceive hunger so to seek food. We perceive thirst so to seek water. We perceive sexual longing so to seek sensual gratification. We perceive cold so to seek warmth. And most importantly we perceive loneliness so to seek the succor of human companionship and mutual affection. Without the myelin sheaths of each other, the bleakness of the world would tear from our breast that which makes us human.

I'll not forget Ellen's kindness in life nor the lesson she imparted to me in death.

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc

Buffett Buffet

by David Walske

The other week Rick and I were wandering aimlessly through the aisles of our neighborhood Target store. I had not been inside a Target in about ten years, but there we were; Rick had seen an advertisement for a portable DVD player on sale at a reduced price. This is an item he had been lusting after for some time but had resisted due to the inordinately high price. Both of us have wearied, over the years, of paying off R&D (Research and Development) costs by purchasing each new gizmo as soon as it hit the consumer shelves - the peril of being an "early adopter," a state of existentialist consumerism [or consumerist existentialism; chicken or egg?]. The Technology Adoption Lifecycle, divides the consumer products market into a continuum of five such states: innovators (will buy even the most ill-conceived, buggy tech crap so long as it is new, new, new), early adopters (glutinous, sweaty palmed, consumers, with credit cards poised and ready for swiping), early majority (okay, so they're not the first on the block to own the new super-widget, at least the stuff they do own didn't max out the Visa® Card, and actually works), late majority (the last on the block to own the super-widget - bought it on sale at Target), and finally the laggards (what's a super-widget?).

On the way to the home electronics section - a journey that at Target requires a long walk past Cocoa Pebbles®, scented candles, books, magazines, and music CDs - I happened to notice a CD entitled, "Jimmy Buffett's Greatest Hits." This perplexed me. I couldn't think of a Jimmy Buffett hit besides the singular, "(Wasting away again in) Margaritaville." Hit, but that was about it. Intrigued. I picked up the CD and flipped it over to read the track listing. "Oh yeah, 'Cheeseburger in Paradise.'" Not that I remembered the song, but I did recall the legal ruckus over two "old ladies" - as I heard the story - that opened a restaurant in Maui, of the same name. Some eight years after founding their "Cheeseburger in Paradise" restaurant, they found themselves staring down the business end of a double-barreled lawsuit brought against them by Jimmy Buffett. According to eOnline.com however, the two entrepreneurs "...had the foresight to protect themselves with a 'service mark' from the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office in 1993, giving them legal protection to use 'Cheeseburger in Paradise' in the restaurant industry."

One hit, one lawsuit, and nothing else I recognized. The rest of the "greatest hits" were completely unknown to me. I quickly lost interest in the CD and abandoned it when the new, new, new "Simpsons®, Hit and Run'" interactive game for XBox® caught my eye.

"'Hit and Run'... must have 'Hit and Run.'"

A little advice: Do not drive or operate heavy machinery immediately after playing "Hit and Run." I found myself driving like a maniac after playing this game. The points you get for knocking things over in the "real" world are not the kind of points you want to accumulate. Fun game though, and this coming from someone who doesn't even like "computer games".

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc

Politics As Usual

by David Walske

Today Arnold Schwarzenegger was sworn in as California's 38th Governor, the first ever in State history to replace a sitting Governor in a recall election. Schwarzenegger delivered his post-inaugural address from the steps of the State Capitol building. An address which included quotes from President John F. Kennedy, Ronald Reagan, and the founding fathers of the United States. His speechwriters also tossed in references to earthquakes, fires, floods, "Soviet tanks rolling through the streets," and God, just to be sure to mine every possible sound-bite diversion. Arnold droned as only he can, "I took this oath [of office] to serve you. To those who have no power, to those who have dropped out - too weary or disappointed with politics as usual - I took the oath to serve you. ...I will not forget my oath and I will not forget you." [Had the wardrobe and prop departments really been on the mark, Arnold would have been costumed with a full-length anodized-copper gown, book, and torch.]

After promising to "not forget" the "weary or disappointed," the new Governor seemed to suffer an immediate memory lapse, stating "As soon as I go inside the Capitol behind me, I will sign my first order as governor. I will sign Executive Order No. 1 - which will repeal the 300 percent increase in the car tax." The assemblage erupted into a roar of cheers and applause. What Arnold failed to mention is that the car tax increase, put into place under existing provisions of California law by Governor Gray Davis, applies only to vehicles with a purchase price of $20,000. [twenty-thousand dollars] or greater, that its repeal would create a $4,000,000,000 [four-billion dollar] sinkhole in California's already hemorrhaging treasury, and that this shortfall would most likely "trickle-down" -[to use a term popularized by the Ronald Reagan administration, since reaching across the aisle for quotes appears to be the hack du jour ]- to municipal government agencies, further straining already cash-strapped Police, Fire Department, and other local services.

Let's be clear about what "Executive Order No. 1" really represents. A $20,000. car is NOT basic transportation. It is a luxury car. Governor Schwarzenegger knows a bit about luxury vehicles, being the proud owner of no less than FIVE Hummers himself -[probably more by now]. The hotly contested car tax increase provided fiscal relief by taxing only those who can afford it - no one NEEDS a luxury car - so as to provide vital services for all Californians, but especially for "... those who have no power, to those who have dropped out - too weary or disappointed," those who one could reasonably assume are not to be found tooling around California in their Hummers. "Executive Order No. 1" is Robin Hood in reverse, AKA "politics as usual."

After repeatedly throwing catch phrases such as "it's hasta la vista, baby" at Davis and his administration during the recall campaign smarmy Schwarzenegger now thanks Governor Davis for his cordiality and cooperation in a smooth transition of power, and asks that as Californians we all put our differences aside and work together. Not to sound partisan in the face of such blithe nonpartisan rhetoric, but every time I hear that sentence uttered by a Republican, a chill runs up my backside.

I heard this same rhetoric after the Nixon versus McGovern election - and then watched as the Watergate scandal of the Nixon administration nearly ripped the country apart. I've also heard it more recently after the Bush versus Gore election, when we were to pull together as a nation after a trying Presidential campaign in which the loser was the victor - Bush won by electoral vote, but trailed by at least 500,000 in the actual popular vote. I then watched as the Bush administration, plunged our nation into the "new Vietnam War" of Iraq, citing a number of U.N. resolutions as premise while acting against the will of the United Nations.

When President Bill Clinton sought to bring the country back together after winning election and then reelection during one of the most economically prosperous periods in American history, the Republican opposition stopped at nothing in their eight-year campaign against the Clinton White House. When the so-called "Whitewater" investigation proved fruitless, the conservative agenda pressed forward into Bill Clinton's personal life, finally snaring him over a private sex act between consenting adults, ultimately forcing an [unsuccessful] impeachment trial.

I'm old enough to remember the last days of the Nixon administration - I was in High School at the time. Nixon blatantly and openly defied Federal court orders, and was implicated in or allegedly committed a list of misdeeds and crimes the length and breadth of which we may never fully be informed. I clearly recall talk of impeachment being cited by Republicans and others as far too radical a measure, that impeaching Richard M. Nixon might do irreparable harm to the country. Nixon was allowed to resign and was subsequently pardoned for any and all crimes in office by his replacement, Republican, Gerald Ford. We were to put our differences aside, to forget and to forgive, to work together. Apparently this credo holds true only for Republican administrations. When Bill Clinton is backed into a corner and driven to perjury over a private act of marital infidelity, apparently a hastily staged impeachment trial is in order. And when a small percentage of the California electorate tires of Governor Gray Davis -[completely innocent of malice or illegal acts in office]- a recall election is apparently de rigueur. And once again we're all to pull together, united in support of Governor HumVee.

I love the State of California, as I love America, with all my heart. I love them both like a parent loves a child. I am willing to speak sharply when my children are lead astray by inappropriate influences. I was born in Nebraska and grew up in Arizona. Midwest cum Southwest, you can't get much more "American heartland" than that. I have been proud to call myself a Californian since moving to Los Angeles in 1974, but today, inauguration day -[at the risk of being "Dixie-Chicked"]- I must say, I find it embarrassing.

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc

Mom Finds Out About Blog

"MINNEAPOLIS, MN - In a turn of events the 30-year-old characterized as 'horrifying,' Kevin Widmar announced Tuesday that his mother Lillian has discovered his weblog.

'Apparently, Mom typed [Widmar's employer] Dean Healthcare into Google along with my name and, lo and behold, PlanetKevin popped up,' Widmar said.

...Widmar mentally raced through the contents of his blog. He immediately thought of several dozen posts in which he mentioned drinking, drug use, casual sex, and other behavior likely to alarm his mother."

More at: http://www.theonion.com/3944/news3.html

Stockholm Calling

by David Walske

What secrets lie shrouded in the Swedish mist? Is there something ominous lurking behind the peaceful facade of Stockholm? No, actually Sweden's secrets according to the official Web site of Swedish tourism include Crayfish and Snaps, the world's strongest man: Magnus Samuelsson -[take that Arnold!], magnificent examples of Old-world architecture, and ABBA! "...Abba has sold over 350 million records. Statistically that would mean that every citizen of EU owns an Abba record." - (Source: Swedish Travel and Tourism Council).

What you may or may not have already surmised however is that Sweden may also perhaps be the most "modern" of countries in all the world, far surpassing the United States and other presumed bastions of modernity. This, according to data collected and geographically plotted at Princeton University and -[as reported in Scientific American (November 14th, 2003) in an article by Rodger Doyle]- at the University of Michigan at Ann Arbor by political scientists Ronald Inglehart and Wayne E. Baker.

What is modernity? The referenced studies used to define and specify modernity as it exists in the world today, plot globally collected data pertaining to values of of secular (rational) thought against those of traditional (dogmatic) along the y-axis, and values which emphasize security and group survival (societal institutionalism) against those that promote self-expression and individualism along the x-axis, aggregating the data from individual countries into nine cultural groups. The resultant mapping of data can be viewed as four quadrants, divided by the x and y axes. The correlative balancing of these factors presents a picture of modernity. The y-axis, tradition versus dogma, describes a degree of seminal and critical thought, unfettered by predisposition, and as Doyle notes in Scientific American the x-axis depicts, "...survival versus self-expression [values which derive] from questions about physical security, trust in other people, gender roles, and personal happiness. Self-expression, almost by definition, implies freedom from extreme need."

Countries located in the upper-right quadrant are thought to be the most modern. While the United States falls near the most favorable region of data mapping, Sweden is the clear winner - with Norway and the Netherlands as close contenders, taking the silver and bronze. In this contest, along with most English-speaking countries -[sorry Canada; I'm still a big fan of Vancouver, B.C.]- the U.S. doesn't even place. In the most antipodal position to that of modernity we find much of the middle-east, a region that our United States Government representing Americans, such poorly ranked contestants as we are -[although not quite as dismally so]- purport to reform. Well, I suppose a methadone addict might be able to rehabilitate a Heroin addict. I would imagine however that this would require a somewhat contrite attitude, rather than that of hubris so ubiquitously prevalent.

So here's how I see it, moving away from the undesirable lower-right quadrant in a clockwise arc, avoiding the tumultuous former Soviet bloc and the repressive regime of mainland China, the choices are: Tokyo, Berlin, Stockholm, or Amsterdam. Hmmm... Amsterdam doesn't sound bad. Not bad at all...

Actually I probably should have closed with an ABBA song - even at the risk of incurring the wrath of Bernadette, as portrayed by Terrence Stamp in the film The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert (1994).

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc

C is for Censorship

While George W. Bush complains about the filtering of news by the mainstream media, having indicated that he rarely watches or listens to news broadcasts preferring to get his own brand of filtered news from his so-called advisors -[it's the "Condi News Network" only the news you want to hear anytime you want to hear it]- CBS scurries to cover the bad PR over the abrupt cancellation of its two-part miniseries "The Reagans," scrapped at the last minute reportedly under pressure from conservative political forces. As reported in The Week magazine (November 14th, 2003), "Republicans said the two-part saga... was a smear on the former president and his wife. In one scene, Nancy Reagan urged her husband to support AIDS research, and he replied, "They that live in sin shall die in sin."

Ronald Reagan did in fact serve out the entirety of his presidency without even once so much as uttering the word AIDS in public, a time during which the disease was sweeping the nation, hitting the Gay community hardest of all. Ronny may not have expressed to "mommy" -[as he was known to refer to his wife, Nancy in private; if we're going to start shouting "pervert!" how sick is that?]- his feelings about the AIDS epidemic in those exact words -[they were probably for more pejorative]- but his record of silence and inaction stands as a basis for inclusion of such dialog. As noted by msnbc.com contributor Michael Ventre, "...this wasn't intended as a documentary. It wasn't a segment of '60 Minutes.' It was a fictionalized dramatization of the life story of a controversial world leader. CBS, or any network or studio, does not have an obligation to adhere to historical fact when developing such a project. All it really needs to do is capture the spirit of the truth." The CBS statement, "We believe it does not present a balanced portrayal of the Reagans for CBS and its audience," just doesn't stand up. As apparently neither did CBS when the pressure was on.

This project was complete and ready to broadcast, advertising dollars in the bank, and promotional spots on the air when CBS caved to pressure and pulled it. Why would CBS take such action? Why would they voluntarily assume such a financial hit, let alone endure the credibility damage. Bill Moyers notes on the PBS broadcast "NOW with Bill Moyers" (November 7, 2003), expressing a degree of disbelief that, "CBS says they're shocked that anybody would suggest they did this because they want the White House, the Congress and the FCC to approve their request to get bigger, to buy more stations."

CBS has certainly caved to pressure in the past, making bad decisions that seemingly had nothing to do with high standards or ethical sensibilities. The film, "The Insider" (1999) offers a dramatic portrayal of the mishandling of the "60 Minutes" segment about tobacco industry whistle-blower Jeffrey Wigand, that seriously damaged the reputation of the long running CBS series and knocked Mike Wallace down a peg or two [or three].

All the more revolting to watch Wallace pontificate about the credibility of CBS news in a pre-taped appearance on the network's sickeningly self-congratulatory television special, "CBS at 75." Wallace would have done far better to, as his character as portrayed in the film by Christopher Plummer bemoaned, "spend the end of [his] days wandering in the wilderness of National Public Radio," with his dignity intact. And yes, be it noted that "The Insider" is indeed a dramatization, but not without it's own insiders, providing more than a few of the intimate details of the debacle for adaptation into screenplay format. It seems that the story behind the story of "The Reagans" may also not be without its own insiders. According to The Week magazine, "Network executives tried to salvage the miniseries by editing it 'with a machete,' [an unnamed] source told Newsweek."

But reportedly, unable to satisfy they who would be monarchy, CBS pulled the plug on Reagan, just as the man himself once did on a generation plagued by AIDS. CBS has licensed the miniseries for eventual release - perhaps - on its sibling, cable channel Showtime, owned by parent broadcasting leviathan Viacom which as notes Bill Moyers,"...owns a galaxy of media properties [and] has billions of dollars resting on whether a White House, Congress, and FCC controlled by Republicans allow it to grow even bigger." Eric Boehlert who has written extensively about politics and media for salon.com and before that for Billboard Magazine and Rolling Stone, Joined Moyers on the November 7th broadcast of NOW, which included the following:

Once again, money not taste or "standards and practice" have caused the CBS eye to blink as it has done so consistently whenever the pressure is on. Tom Smothers, appearing with his brother Dick Smothers on the CBS anniversary special engaged in some very light weight sparing with his former adversarial employer, the network that canceled the highly popular but politically controversial "Smother's Brothers Comedy Hour." I suppose one has to chalk it up to the healing properties of time -[as expressed in the caption of a recent cartoon in "The New Yorker" magazine which read, "Tragedy plus time equals comedy."]- but I remember harsher words from Tommy on the subject. Paraphrasing repartee between Tom Smothers and Johnny Carson some years ago during his appearance on NBC's "The Tonight Show":

In the meantime, the History Channel of the A&E Television Networks - a joint venture of the Hearst Corporation (37.5%; ABC, Inc., 37.5%; and NBC, 25%) - airs as planned its November 16th presentation of "JFK, A Presidency Revealed," rife with personal details about John F. Kennedy's life during his all too brief stay in the White House. I imagine the Republicans won't be clamoring to get this project scrapped.

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc

PC Macro Magic

As reported by Genre Magazine (November 2003), a "Letter to the Editor" published in Gay City News (September 11, 2003).

From a letter dated September 3, 2003.

"To the Editor:

I am writing to express my outrage at the discriminatory language that is used in your newspaper to refer to our community.

Though it was a good policy to change 'gay' and 'gay and lesbian' and then to 'LGBT' in every instance - and I applaud you for that - I believe that LGBT is still too limited and exclusionary.

I am offended by that.

To embrace the many people in our community who are being left out in the cold, I suggest the following term: 'gay/lesbian/queer/questioning/bisexual/ transgendered/men who have sex with men/people who don't like labels/gay men with wives/leather fetish community,' which can be abbreviated 'GLQQBTMWHSWMPWDLLGM-WWLFC.'

This term is not cumbersome and, in my experience, works well in conversation. For example: 'Do your parents know you're GLQQBTMWHSWMPWDLLGM-WWLFC?'

To be safe, I have programmed a macro on my keyboard so that, whenever 1 type g-a-y-space bar, it is automatically changed to GLQQBTMWHSWMPWDLLGM-WWLFC.

Your newspaper should urgently adopt the same policy."

Obsession

by David Walske

I spent the better part of the weekend - commencing midday on Friday - bringing Jouissance to 100% XHTML 1.0 code compliance. I worked through the night and well into the daylight hours -[a dangerous thing for a Nosferati; thank goodness for "blackout blinds"]. With the sound track from the film "Lost in Translation" playing in a continuous loop, I edited over 2,000 lines of HTML source code. Rick asked me to articulate what being "XHTML compliant" means, and what this would do for me, us, etc. From his point of view there were few, if any observable changes -[certainly nothing proportionate to a 72-hour coding marathon]- with the exception of some minor layout changes and some new graphics -[one of them a click-through button for the Jouissance store; more on that soon].

I was not able to adequately communicate the specifics of the underlying technical changes nor the dire need for these improvements that had kept me working day-after-day, nearly nonstop -[okay, we did take out some time to see "Alien, the Director's Cut" at the Cinerama Dome on Saturday evening, and I did sleep some this weekend - but only just a bit, and under duress. More on "Alien, the Director's cut" in forthcoming posts. I've built quite a back log - backblog? - during the code-a-thon].

Jouissance is now RSS syndicated for distribution via various newsreaders and RSS services, such as Syndic8 for example. Strict code compliance helps to facilitate the republication of Jouissance syndicated content. Click the XHTML button that appears near the bottom of the right column in each Blog page, to view an official real-time W3C XHTML 1.0 "strict" compliance verification.

To celebrate the new improved XHTML Jouissance I colored my hair JET BLACK. Really. [Web-cam photo coming soon.]

How's that, obsession AND compulsion. Woo-hoo

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc

explore

12WORDS4YEAR03

november 03

explore

"Shed the cocoon and take to the road. Develop an Indiana Jones complex. Order the haggis. Watch subtitles. Listen to Rap. Hang glide. Go Blonde. Do Tequila. Read Ulysses. Explore: it's aerobics for the mind."

Copyright © 2003 The St. John Group

Sweetheart Deal

by David Walske

Hey, I'm learning magic! Really. I'm studying Blaine-style "street magic," but without the Lucite-boxed caloric-deprived claustrophobia and jeering from Londoners. I've never been much of a card-game player, so the first few tricks I'm learning that require me to work with playing cards are forcing me to become more familiar with the ol' deck of fifty-two. More on my budding magic vocation as it progresses. But no card trick I'll ever learn could be even half as stupefying as the tricks with which the Bush Administration continues to fool a large percentage of the American public.

Fortunately, if the polls speak truthfully, each day fewer are deceived by the smoke and mirrors that conceal the perfidy and sweetheart deals of President Bush Inc. [It seems as though hardly anyone remembers this, but one of George W. Bush's campaign slogans called for government to be run like a corporation. Post Enron, et al we don't hear much talk like that from George and the gang.]

As George Bush moves Condolezza [in for the kill] into Iraq, let's take a quick look at "Condy's" [as Mr. Bush has publicly referred to Ms. Rice] own sweetheart dealings -[never mind the fact that Chevron named an oil tanker in her honor, quietly changing its name after she was appointed to be White House advisor - a job title that, ever since the days of the Nixon Administration, always seems to have a nefarious ring to it.]

From "The War Profiteers Card Deck" Web site:

"Condoleezza shows up in all the right places: State Department, Rand Corporation, Hoover Institute, Strategic Nuclear Policy advisor to the Joint Chiefs, Chevron and Transamerica Corp. boardrooms...

Her biography verily glows. But we'll leave that for you to look into. What's important here is her corporate connections: She was a Chevron Director from 1991 until January 15, 2001 when she was transferred by President George Bush Jr. to National Security Adviser."

More at http://www.warprofiteers.com/cards/hearts/three.html

While you're checking up on Condy, visit the other "sweethearts" profiled on this site where you can read interesting résumé tidbits on such notables as Dick Cheney and the rest of the gang. I heard Donny Rumsfeld, former Nixon advisor, is a really fun date!

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc

Naked Beatles

by David Walske

Meet the Naked Beatles! Not John and Yoko this time, although all these years later I remain a fan of the duo even if John is still with us only in spirit. I'm still enraptured by the "Bed In" and still delightfully haunted by the dialog that yet rings my ears from the BBC documentary, The World of John and Yoko:

" Yoko: Fortunately, erm, I'm in love with you.
John: Unfortunately, I'm in love with you too.
Yoko: But in the end I think we agree.
John: Fortunately, we don't know.
Yoko: Unfortunately, we think we know.
John: But in the end we'll find out.
Yoko: Unfortunately...
John: No - Fortunately.
Yoko: Yes fortunately, erm, fortunately, er, I think I'm sleepy enough tonight to go to sleep.
John: Unfortunately, we'll never sleep with all this going on.
Yoko: In the end, we'll have a nice dream.
John: Fortunately that's possible."

Sorry for the digression, but I just love that piece.

This time though it's the Beatles' music that's getting naked, not any of the Beatles themselves [dang]. To be released on November 18th, 2003, "Let It Be... NAKED" is the music CD equivalent of a "Director's Cut" DVD. According to an article by Augustin Sedgewick and Jon Harris in "Rolling Stone" (September 18th,2003), "...the album does away with the orchestration added by legendary producer Phil Spector and restores Paul McCartney's 'back to basics' concept that originally underpinned the project."

"The Week" magazine (November 7th, 2003) notes that this new remix of the Beatles so-called "swan-song" album, originally released May 8, 1970, "...captures [the Beatles'] scaled back ambitions.." for the recording session which "...was intended as a return to their rock roots." Spector remixed the 1970 release with lavish orchestration that, according to Sedgewick and Harris in their "Rolling Stone" article and as reported in "The Week" has, "always been a source of irritation to Paul McCartney."

The new release omits two tracks from the original - "Dig It" and "Maggie Mae" - while adding new material - vocal dialogs from the recording sessions themselves and a new track "Don't Let Me Down." For any enduring Beatles fan - like me - this is one to wait for impatiently, if need be in front of Virgin Megastore on the 18th, or better yet one to put on "pre-order" at Amazon. I think I'll do that right now: click, click.

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc

Automata

By David Walske

The body electric

Since long before the digital and industrial revolutions we have sought to create thinking machines, some of them in our own image. In her book "Edison's Eve" Gaby Wood writes of the twin automata of Neuchâtel, Switzerland. Since they were first exhibited in 1774 these extremely lifelike automated effigies of two young boys have faithfully performed for audiences traveling from afar to see them, one writing several lines of text using a quill pen and the other drawing flawless portraits of kings Louis XV and George III. Wood states, "...the writer ...communicates to its audience an eerie philosophical joke: 'I think,' it writes, 'therefore I am.' ...these artificial beings have enchanted, frightened, and perplexed their viewers."

In spite of their amazing performances the twin mechanical boys are of course not really human, in fact they're not even thinking machines. The little boy may appear to taunt us with his prose, but in fact it is its maker, Pierre Jaquet-Droz that stings us with such deliciously ironic humor.

Bad Robot:Good Robot

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc

Universal Elegance, and a bit a rowdy

Now Playing on MY TiVo: Monday, November 03, 2003

by David Walske

Just back from Sedona and gratefully back to TiVo-land - see previous post. While away we stayed connected to the word of television with 4DTV, which provides a combination of analog and digital programming via C-Band dish -[i.e., an eight-foot diameter satellite dish, not to be confused with the small 18" digital dishes sprouting like epiphytes on nearly every apartment building and home, just about everywhere in the world]. 4DTV is great. Access to 500+ channels ain't entirely a bad thing, in spite of the obvious potential for "Information Anxiety." Especially enticing is the opportunity to view "wild feeds."

Wild feeds are television signals sent via satellite from major networks and other sources to local television stations. The local stations then rebroadcast these feeds, usually delayed and in edited form but sometimes live, such as in the case of a Presidential debate or address. The fun thing about watching wild feeds on a C-band dish is that from time to time you get to see content that was never intended for public consumption. The video and audio are set up in advance. The feed is established and transmitting live, to insure that there are no last-minute technical glitches that might otherwise delay a live broadcast. The speaker(s) are in place and broadcasting live audio and video well before the actual start of the broadcast, but they aren't always aware of this fact. Wild feed viewers once watched Jesse Jackson tie and retie his necktie for forty-five minutes.

One of the most famous "Wild Feed Moments" is Ronald Reagan's remark uttered just prior to a scheduled Presidential address, "...I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in Five minutes."
 

But even with live access to such great moments in Republican history, and more channels than you can shake a remote at, 4DTV still can't compete with TiVo. It's not the number of channels you receive, it's how you organize, monitor, and access the programming they provide. There is a lesson in information architecture in here somewhere. 4DTV has a better than average built-in program guide, but it's still easy to get lost in orbit instead of "Lost In Space." TiVo rules!

Imagine how happy I was to return home to Los Angeles after a week's absence to find - just as expected - that TiVo had faithfully recorded all of my favorite shows - those that are in season. A lot of my Season Pass favorites are on hiatus for the summer. Jonesing pretty badly just about now for some of them. So while waiting for the return of "Six Feet Under," "Sex and the City," and "Queer as Folk" to glorify Sunday evening, I checked out the "Six Feet Under" online trivia quiz. I'm a die-hard [no pun intended], never-missed-an-episode, "Six Feet Under" fan. I really know my trivia when it comes to "Six Feet Under," and I'm telling you, this quiz is tough. I had to struggle to maintain an average over 80% - the game keeps a running score as you play. Great fun! Try it.

What's on MY TiVo This Week

The Elegant Universe

"The string's the thing." This elegantly produced, PBS two-part NOVA presentation is just what the Ph.D. ordered. Especially if Quantum Mechanics, String Theory, and Parallel Universes leave you feeling a little queasy. "I knew I shouldn't have eaten that Quark Taco."

Hosted by author and physicist Brian Greene, this mini-series puts it all into perspective. Newton's apple, wrapped in the caramel of Einstein's space-time continuum, topped with subatomic sprinkles, and held together by harmonic strings, this show made for the best Halloween treat I've ever had.

Seriously If you need a little help understanding the cutting edge of physics, or even if you don't [or just think you don't], this is a wildly entertaining program - very well produced, visually stunning, and thematically stimulating. Imagine the best time you every had as a kid reading your favorite comic book; mix that with a historical perspective of physics, add in the latest cutting edge research in physics, and you've got the idea. Brian Greene is a charming and highly knowledgeable host. Don't miss this.

UPDATE (031105): If you miss the air dates for "The Elegant Universe" you can still catch the show on the Web as streaming video at: http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/elegant/program.html

Episode One

"Einstein's Dream; the String's the Thing"

Running time: 2 Hours

• First aired: Tuesday, October 28th, 2003 - 9:00 PM - KCET in Los Angeles - I wasn't home, but TiVo was.
• Airs again: Wednesday November 5th, 2003 - 8:00 PM - KOCE in Orange County
• Additional air dates: Check TiVo or your local PBS affiliate

This opening episode consists of two well-divided one-hour segments. On KCET they are shown as a combined single episode with a brief intermission between the neatly cleaved halves - a cleaving much cleaner than atomic fission, and without all that pesky nuclear waste. If two hours at a sitting is too much for you, this format makes it easy to watch the show in two, more manageable chunks. I downed the entire two-hour episode like a shot of Cuervo, panting like a dog at the end thirsty for more.

Episode Two

"The Elegant Universe; Welcome to the Eleventh Dimension"

Running time: 1 Hour

• First air date: Tuesday, November 4th, 2003 - 8:00 PM - KCET in Los Angeles
• Airs again: Wednesday November 12th, 2003 - 9:00 PM - KOCE in Orange County
• Additional air dates: Check TiVo or your local PBS affiliate

This second - one-hour episode - continues the journey, successfully unifying five different string theories into a single theory.

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NOW With Bill Moyers

Another PBS production, "NOW With Bill Moyers" continues to make a rich and valuable contribution. Without intending any disrespect to anyone, I often refer to this show as "The Thinking Man's 'Sixty Minutes.'" Bill Moyers is a national treasure, and this newsmagazine format show is an excellent vehicle for him and the thoughtful news and commentary that he, and his guests and colleagues bring.

Wendy Kaminer

This week among other vital issues and stories, Bill Moyers welcomes Wendy Kaminer to NOW. Ms. Kaminer, a commentator, author, scholar, agnostic, and former Guggenheim Fellow writes about law, liberty, feminism, religion, and popular culture. Her latest article published in the October/November issue of "Free Inquiry" a publication of the Council for Secular Humanism, is titled "The Real Danger Behind the Christian Right".  (PDF: 99k)

Wendy Kaminer is an important voice of clarity in uncertain times. She clarifies her position as an agnostic, deeply concerned with the rights of all Americans under the Constitution and its protection of the separation of church and state. She intones a particularly strong emphasis that this provision of Constitutional protection is of significant importance to those of religious conviction. Without such protections, the government could mandate a singular state religion, thereby squandering the religious freedoms of anyone outside an arbitrarily drawn boundary of prescribed faith. This would be no less a calamity for those of religion that it would be for agnostics and atheists. Religion is a matter of personal faith, and is not to be legislated or voted upon. Ms. Kaminer makes the point that agnostic and atheist activists, are in function the strongest allies of religious Americans.

TiVo's To Do List

Everyone's got a To Do List - What, you thought you were the only one? TiVo has one to. After you set up your TiVo Season Passes and Wish Lists, you can just sit back and wait for your favorite shows to pop up on the TiVo Now Playing menu. Or you can peer into the future by sneaking a peek at TiVo's To Do List.

The Office

On MY TiVo's To Do List: more hilarious episodes of the BBC series "The Office." A new TiVo Season Pass for me, I've missed out on a few of the episodes, but with TiVo, I'll soon catch up. "The Office" is ABFAB meets K Street, and it's absolutely fabulous. Not for everyone; definitely for me.

Thanks to Wally and Elizabeth for the tip about this show.

Airs weekly: BBCA (BBC America) - Check TiVo or your local directory for times and days.

Copyright © 2003 David Walske Inc